People / Relationships

Brokenness in families

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“Brokenness in families”

Isn’t it disappointing or confusing to see how family members can sometimes live in constant hypocrisy?

One day, they are just so loving, caring and full of appreciation. We enjoy spending time with them and throwing parties together. Forget about them missing any important day of our lives, call it birthdays or any other family’s celebration. We simply love their presence around us! Oftentimes, we just found ourselves expressing the kind of love that we’ve never dared to question because (you know) they are just FAMILY… Period.

“Huuum, I’ve found myself in love …(sounds like music to my ears)… when it comes to family.”

On another day, the beginning of several days as such: bad mouths, critics behind the back and any form of negativism, destructive comments, brush our ears. 

This time, coming from the least expected persons, i.e family members, it simply feels like stirring a knife in the wound.

Pain?

Confusion?

Disappointment?

Resentment?

Bitterness?

Hate?

Etc.

Hard to express our feelings in those moments, right?

All we can tell is that it does hurt…

Hurt to see that those you thought were supposed to cover your flaws are actually the ones exposing them. 

Hurt to realize that the “safe” place where you used to share your little secrets or weaknesses is no longer a safe one anymore.

Well, here I am…exposing the other side of a loving family.The one that is most of the time hidden among families.

A side full of hypocrisy, mockery, betrayal, jealousy, competition, hate, bitterness, just too much BROKENNESS!

Before you realize it, from a place where love used to be the foundation, bitterness and hate have just laid down roots.

From something that started with maybe a few family members, it is now being transferred from one generation to another; simply turning into a cycle of hypocrisy.

As much as there may be beautiful pictures, with pretty faces being posted on social media; the truth is, sometimes, we fail to really deal with the root cause of the bitterness and hate that have been hunting our families over the course of years.

Let’s stay mindful that we are imperfect people. Imperfect people, carrying some burdens, hurts from all of our different background experiences, but still part of the same “Family.”

All this being said…

As much as it might be so easy to point fingers or even list the names of those who have done us wrong, What about us?

What is our own role/responsibility in all this?

Who are we? Are we keeping the mask on? Charming the rest of the world, yet deceiving ourselves?

Right in the middle of that loving and broken family, are we the ones spreading more love or hate?

What kind of siblings do we choose to be?

What kind of example do we wish to leave as parents?

We can’t change other people, but we can initiate the change within ourselves!

“Imperfect people thriving to act differently.”

To spreading more Love or Hate?

Your choice,

With Love,

Ritsa M.

P-S: Thank you for reading, till next time…

ritsamwiza

Driven by Passion.
Born to impact and leave a legacy!
Made to worship and please my God.

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2 Comments

  1. Thank you Ritsa for this writing ✍, was reading it on my way to work, and enjoy it 😀, so is it beautiful to be with a family member celebrate something with all their presence, it’s bring joy,and as you said u can’t question their love, caring because u know they’re family.
    So for me I can choose to be a siblings to spread more love and unity in the broken family which is not easy 😁,but also pray for God to help, because as this verse says
    Proverbs 18:
    “19 Un frère que l’on a offensé est plus inaccessible qu’une ville fortifiée,
    et des dissensions sont plus tenaces que les verrous d’un château.”alors pour moi ce ne que Dieu seul can heal your wound and use u to bring joy,love again in that kind of family. 🤷‍♂️
    Thanks Ritsa, Bless day.

    1. Amen! Thank you Alain!

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